A brand new year presents many opportunities to help our children with the challenges that come their way. One of the things we may not think about is the importance of continually growing and making changes in our lives as individuals. Our children learn by watching us. In fact, most children talk about their own New Year's resolutions by watching and listening to their parents as they discuss their personal resolutions. Mentoring for our children that change is difficult, but not insurmountable, is best done with actions, not words. Reminding your children that self-talk such as, "can't" or "it's too difficult," can be overcome by saying new and stronger self-talk such as, "I can do this" and "I will make these changes."
|If you are trying to make changes, no matter what area they are in, the first work you have to do is clear your mind of the "I cant's." To help you get rid of the old thoughts that keep you stuck in the rut of can't, try these tips.|
Old patterns are difficult to break, and no matter what negative pattern you are trying to extinguish, you will fall off track once in a while. This is to be expected, and rather than going back and shaming yourself, try to catch yourself and ask yourself what good this food, relationship, or whatever old pattern you are trying to break free from will do for you. Rather than indulging in the old pattern, try breathing through the moment or distract yourself with exercise, calling a friend, or getting away from the situation you are in. Being proactive at times of weakness helps you accomplish your goal leading to increased confidence that you are breaking free of your old rut.When you change your thoughts, you change your life, your children's lives, and the lives of every person who you connect with.
Mary Jo Rapini, MEd, LPC, is a licensed psychotherapist and co-author with Janine J. Sherman, of Start Talking: A Girl's Guide for You and Your Mom About Health, Sex or Whatever. Read more about the book at www.StartTalkingBook.com and more about Rapini at www.maryjorapini.com.